Dear DbyDC: Should I shave my head?

Dear Death by Dress Code,

I’m a white man with what can best be described as a ‘mop’ of very thick, unmanageable black hair. My girlfriend insists that the mop stays, but I long for the days when I could just ask the barber for a number 3 all over and walk out 30mins later, only £8 poorer and about a kilo lighter.

Sadly, she insists that the close cut look isn’t for her and so far I’ve obeyed her demands. Can you come up with a viable compromise, or do I just have to do what she says until one of us dies?

Thanks.

 

Dear Mop-Top,

First of all, are you Jason Statham’s twin brother? If the answer is anything other than “ohmygod, I literally get that ALL the time” then the chances of you looking good with a shaved head are very slim indeed. Let’s face it, even Becks looked a bit of an arse.

In terms of doing what she says, well normally I’m of the ‘fuck the haters, man, you make your own style rules’ persuasion but on this occasion it does sound suspiciously like she might know best. However, there’s bound to be a compromise. Have you considered going the other way and growing it so it’s actually longer than hers? That’d freak her out. Or what about straightening it? Again, I’m feeling shock and awe tactics are the way forward here.

Failing that you could always just get a trim every three to six months like everyone else.

Ta ra, DbyDC xx

***

DbyDC is now an agony aunt. Tweet me your dilemmas or drop me a line.

WARNING: May contain light mocking.

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